Is currently on a “diet”. This is upsetting for two reasons:
1. I’m about 5 times as big as him right now, yet he keeps talking about getting abs and so on. My version of a “diet” is to stop drinking beer and start drinking vodka.
2. He’s cooking healthily and cycling about 5 miles a day. He’s so determined that it’s making me really want to eat some chocolate as I feel like such a failure. I don’t even really like chocolate that much.
Damn him.

